April 15, 2009

Reality Rundown: One Leg in Bangkok

In this Reality Rundown...

The Amazing Race - Off to Bangkok, where the world's your oyster. The Roadblock requires one team member to properly put a propeller on a rod, then they will take this boat to the next clue. What 2 teams fail to consider is that this boat might not return, so 2 teams don't bring their bags with them to the next clue. Now I think this week has the most awesome Detours yet, and this is from someone who has loved several legs. The choices: fit 5 toothless people with the correct dentures or get in a party cab and sing karaoke with Thai Trannies. Both hilarious, but of course I'd go karaoke. Margie and Luke actually do the teeth and take first place. But here's the crazy stuff: the sisters try to check in, but left behind their backpacks and the fannypak with their passports, so they have to retrieve those before they can check in. The tiny brothers also left their backpacks so before they even do the detour, they go all the way back to get their gear. But they don't have much money, so they offer personal items as a bargain ("real expensive, very nice!"). So the brothers check in 4th, however, bargaining with personal items is a huge rule-breaker and worth a 2 hour penalty and they did this twice, so it's a 4 hour penalty! WOW! This is one rule I didn't know. So the sisters return and are safe. BUT, luckily for the little guys, this is a non-elimination leg so they are still in it, but downside is they will start 4 hours later for the penalty and will have to complete a Speedbump on the way. Ouch! These 2 are so dumb I wish they got eliminated, but look forward to them squirming through the next leg. (Original image from BuddyTV.com)

New! Groomer Has It - I admit, I enjoy this dog-pun filled show so I'll cover it occasionally. 12 dog groomers compete for the title Groomer of the Year, which also includes a new car, dog grooming van, and a cash prize (hosted by ex-Queer Eye Culture Gay, Jai Rodriguez). The Quick Sniff challenge has them in teams of 3 grooming a St. Bernard, but the only tools with tools they can get from houses in the neighborhood. The winning team makes their dog adorable and wins fancy dinner, while the others get Doggy Bags. The elimination challenge is to groom standard poodles (a groomer's ideal dog), but instead make them into art pieces. It's a trainwreck, and the losing team chose a Hollywood theme, but really hurt the dog's skin in the process. The guy in charge of the washing/brushing was to blame and "clipped." And sadly, the catchphrase "Every dog has its day, and today is not yours" is gone. (image from Animal Planet)

Tough Love - Tough beotch Stasha leaves the house with her new emo boyfriend that she met one week before the show. Jody's date comes to the house and apologizes for last week, and they kiss and make up. There's a funny lesson about judging guys who wear shirts, including "I have chlamydia" and "I'm impotent" which is great. Even after an early talk with Steve and his Mom, Arianne gets called out for being a slut, again- but Steve says the guy likes her so he'll set up another date. At a party to mingle, Taylor hits it off with a good looking young guy, but ditches him to instead hit on the rich 40-something throwing the party, which later lands her in the hot seat. She insists the older guy was sexy, but clearly the money is what makes him sexy but she won't admit it. The older guy was in fact an actor Steve sent him- haha! SERVED by Steve! (image from Blog.VH1.com)

Dancing with the Stars - I really didn't pay attention to the first 40 minutes, but that's probably a good thing. Tonight they danced either the Jive or the sexy Rumba. As I predicted, Gilles Marini was not as good at the fun, American Jive as he was with the Latin dances. Overall, and mainly based on the blips of dancing they show at the end with the voting numbers, I'd say Lawrence Taylor and Ty Murray were the 2 worst and will be in the bottom, with Lawrence going home.

On the Results Show, the celebrities get to design the costumes for next week. I'm pretty surprised when Lawrence Taylor is safe- so obviously Ty Murray and Steve-O are the bottom 2 and Steve-O goes home. (image from ABC.com)

I Love Money - Loudmouth is the challenge and the contestant who yells the loudest and longest after a few rounds will be Paymaster. Myammee and her lingerie win Paymaster, while 20 Pack is the dead last loser. However, 20 Pack doesn't care because he knows he's safe after the deal he made last week. But Tailor Made's alliance doesn't want to keep that deal, plus Myammee wasn't in the room so doesn't consider herself obligated to keep the deal. But Tailor Made wants to keep it; TM knows that in the end a jury essentially decides final 2 and he doesn't want to burn bridges. I20 Pack and Saaphyri are the frontrunners for eliminations. Saaphyri hates Myammee and is close to It, and 20 Pack is the strongest: so who goes home? When 20 gets called to get his check, he knows he's good but nope. Myamme says she sticks with her alliance and they want him gone. Check BOUNCED! (image from Blog.VH1.com)

The Biggest Loser - Makeovers with Tim Gunn! Everyone looks really sexy afterwards, though a beardless scary-without-a-shirt Ron is a little spooky. Ron's son/Mike's younger brother sees the new skinny family and feels like the odd fatty out- my mom called it the saddest thing she's ever seen on the show ever. With limited workouts this week, everyone prepares for bad numbers on the scale. To make matters worse, Lazy Laura (who has been less lazy lately, and has an amazing new look) has a stress fracture in her hip and can't do any real workouts. Lazy Laura and my girl Kristin fall below the yellow line, and it's a hard choice for the Losers. To me it's unfair for Laura to stay because she won't be able to truly take advantage of the ranch and the trainers anymore, so clearly Kristen should stay (and that's not just because I love me some Kristen). Tara is adamant about sending Laura home, saying she needs the support. Some consider voting off Kristen because she's a bigger threat, even after an amazing speech imploring them to keep her so she can get better- it's not about money, but being healthy for her. Kristen really does need it, so when she gets 2 votes at elimination, I panic. But in the end, Laura goes home and gets the medical help she needs. (images from NBC.com)