July 10, 2009

Reality Rundown: 1-800-Fan-Friggin'-Tastic


The Next Food Network Star - The aspiring FN stars' first task is to create a kid-friendly dish using nasty ingredients which include brussel sprouts, squid, and tofu. There's no winner selected, but Greek God Jeffrey seems to have been deemed best. And next, it's Rachael Ray talk show time! The chefs are paired up and they will do a live 5 minute cooking demo on The Rachael Ray Show. This is great for viewers, because we don't have to hear Rachael's raspy voice for 15 minutes. Melissa/Flamboyant Mike are shadows of themselves, but the food is good. Debbie/Katie do well as a team, but Katie's bulging eyes kill me. Jeffrey/Jameka are just off from the first second, and Jameka freezes in the demo, plus the food stinks. Jameka feels this has been a challenging week, letting her poor performance in the kid-friendly challenge get to her. But Katie did crummy in her 2 demos (one being extremely condescending) and her food always stinks. I think the saying is like 7 strikes and you're out, so Katie is finally sent away. Next week: Miami! (Image from FoodNetwork.com)

The Bachelorette - Jillian takes her beaus off to Spain for some fun, food, and fantasy suites! Or really, a bunch of rooms some poor production assistants spent hours lighting candles and finding roses for and then Jillian doesn't use them. That's right- 3 of the 4 dudes do not get to experience the Fantasy Suites. I think Jillian's decision makes sense, and it shows she's taking this love stuff seriously- but bummer for Fantasy Suites. However, Ed does get to use the Fantasy Suite with Jillian, but they use the time together to catch up on all the time lost when he left. To sum up the other dates: Kiptyn gets to fandango or something like that and is a snooze, and Reid gets a picnic and a lot of PDA. And of course there's Wes. The date lacks any PDA (shocking!), and at dinner Wes fesses up that is it was his manager's idea for him to do the show, and confesses the girlfriend thing. At the Rose Ceremony, Jillian is finally not a moron and gets rid of Wes, who then gives a great post-elimination limo ride. In the limo, Wes gets pretty trashed and brags about being the 1st guy to get to the final 4 with a girlfriend, make fun of the other guys, and spill booze on himself. Now, before I was all for Ed to be the winner, but I'm starting to love Reid. Reid for the win! (Image from BuddyTV)

So You Think You Can Dance
-It's one of the most important nights yet: it's the last round before the Top 10, plus each pair will do 2 routines. Getting into the Top 10 is crucial because 1. America is the sole decision maker going forward and 2. the dancers get to go on tour. Who is definitely making that tour? Brandon/Janette who were flawless with an Argentinian Tango and Wade Robson jazz piece. They were so good, I kid you not, my puppy stopped playing with his chew toy and stared at the screen. And to confirm it was because of the dance, I rewound twice and he stated everytime. If Schroeder likes it, it's good. Melissa/Ade also are sho-ins, but I thought their disco was only OK (judges loved it). Evan/Randi were better in their hip hop than their samba, but are both likable dancers. While Kayla/Kupono did well in their contemporary number, I still think they'll be in the bottom. Face it- America doesn't dig this pairing (I'm leaning towards the America dislikes Kayla theory). Also likely to be on America's shizz-list: Caitlin/Jason. They have zero chemistry=- watching them is so dull, and I think the viewers don't care much for Caitlin either. Philip/Jeanine did well with an easy Russian Folk routine followed by a Jive, but I feel he's holding her back. But here's the other fun part about Top 10: the partners rotate! So next week, I think Jeanine will be able to shine much more. Bottom 3 prediction: Philip/Jeanine, Caitlin/Jason, Kayla/Kupono. (Image from BuddyTV)

Results show! The bottom 3 end up being Philip/Jeanine, Caitlin/Jason, and Melissa/Ade. WHAAAAAAT? I'm pretty shocked Kayla/Kupono made the cut because I thought personality might matter more. Nigel takes time to explain how eliminations work and really it's not "Who should go home", rather "Who do we want to keep here longer?" It's pretty clear Caitlin is going home, even before dancing for their lives. But who of the boys will leave? While Philip is amazing at his own style, picking up the other genres isn't as easy for him so he is eliminated, leaving with an inspiring speech about following your dreams. But good news: Caitlin and Philip will both get to go on tour, so it will be Top 12 rather than 10 to pay $50 to see live. (Images from MSNBC)

Top Chef Masters
- Have to admit: I don't love Masters as much as the real Top Chef; in fact, I dozed off for 15 minutes in the middle and had to rewind. But I shall still watch for you readers! For the Quickfire, the chefs have to showcase their egg cooking talent with one arm behind their back. NYC chef Anita Lo wins the Quickfire with 5 stars, while John Besh and his raw egg from Louisiana sets a new low with 1/2 star- ouch. For the elimination challenge, they cook for Neil Patrick Harris (!!) and his magician friends at the Magic Castle; and yes, Ed Alonzo aka Max from Saved by the Bell is present. Each chef is assigned a magical term to theme their dish around. Mark Peel of LA gets "Mystery" so uses a French technique that cooks the dish in paper bags or something- it's tres cool. Josh Besh has "Surprise" so makes sorbet at the table like a magic trick. Anita Lo was given "Illusion" so she makes her plate look like a beach, and hides a steak tartare in something that looks like a scallop. And the guy who got "Spectacle" makes a hot mess of a dish. Mark Peel takes the early lead, despite a poor Quickfire performance, but Anita Lo's dish captivated the diners and she wins the episode. I end the episode still thinking John Besh looks like the long-lost father of Beans Aranguren. (Images from Super Chef Blog and The Oregon Herald: The Real Deal)

New! Big Brother - 12 new houseguests enter what is a Goin' Green themed house. Most rooms are pretty sleek, but one room is a doozy: it looks like an indoor pool, including a slide and the beds have inflatable rafts on them. As long as there are sheets, I'd want that room- it would be memorable! The case is a lot more diverse (read: kind homelier) than usual. Why? Because they are being split into 4 cliques, ala high school: Populars, Athletes, Braniacs, and Offbeats. Personality wise, I think the Offbeats are my favorite (and my pick to win, Casey, is in that clique)... until a twist occurs. There will be 13 houseguests this season, and what ever clique wins the first competition will get this new player added to their clique and this newbie will the the Head of Household (HOH). Turns out, the 13th houseguest is someone who has played before and fits into the clique. And when they reveal who could re-enter the game, I crap myself in fear. Cowboy (BB5), one of the most annoying houseguests in history, is the Offbeat representative. I pray the Offbeats lose. I am routing for the Braniacs or Populars, because they have Brian (BB10) and Jessica (BB8) who I didn't mind before. Bodybuilder/idiot Jessie (BB10) is playing for the Athletes. Now the competition: the houseguests (HGs) will be suspended in the air holding onto a toilet seat, while receiving massive wedgies. Good times! After mucho suspense, the Athletes win and Jessie gets another shot at Big Brother. I don't love Jessie, but anything beats Cowboy. (Image from CBS.com)

The Fashion Show - 5 are left- has this show been on forever? First challenge has the contestants showcasing their draping skills and Daniella wins again. For a young designer fresh out of school, she's really impressive. Elimination challenge: design a red carpet dress utilizing Swarovski crystals. They each get help in the form of a previously eliminated designer and they all seem so shocked by this. Have any of them watched a reality show before? The losers always return to help. Daniella takes a risk by using a smoky gray fabric, while Anna tries to use a bold floral print. James Paul plays it safe, but really, it looks so old and dated. Johnny, who just seems better than everything in fashion, is so not into red carpet but gets "inspired" by a dress Maggie Gyllenhal wore once... so inspired that it's 99% the exact same dress. The judges have to decide which is a greater crime: a hideous dress or plagiarizing. Luckily, Johnny is sent home for being a copycat (and by the way, this isn't the first time they've questioned if his designs looked too similar to the original). Next week: FINALLY! I mean, finale. (Images from BravoTV.com and Pop Culture Nerd)

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