October 16, 2009

Reality Rundown: Put Diamonds on the Crotch and You're Home Free

The Amazing RaceThe Biggest LoserTop ChefSurvivorProject Runway


The Amazing Race - The race heads to Phnom Penh, Cambodia (no, not Sean Penn) and are on an even-playing field again, even when it seems some racers might not make the flight there. Upon arrival in Cambodia, the teams get a clue with a photo from "assignment editors" at the Foreign Correspondents Club; that photo has a picture of Jackie O, who half the teams think might be a Queen of Cambodia. Morons! The Detour is to find a scarf in a crowded marketplace or attempt to sell 4 helmets. Team Rage (Lance and Keri) are the only ones who do the helmets and of course they would- look how social they are! Zev and Justin take an early lead and are riding high, even when Zev breaks down while mimicing a monkey for the Roadblock. They are team #1 but uh-oh- they lost Zev's passports. The horrible Poker Players are last to arrive but end up safe again, because without passports, you can't race. Without passports, you can get SERVED.

The Biggest Loser - Temptation with a twist! Time to split into teams and one player will gain control of the game and select teams. Spin a giant wheel with silver platters and eat what's under the platter, with the goal of finding the "Choose Teams" golden ticket. The losers (and viewers) are all saying the same thing: anyone but Tracy. Well we're all screwed: Tracy gets the power on her first try. Frak.

Tracy chooses to be on the Blue team, hilariously reasoning that she has bonded with Bob (who is also bewildered by this statement) and brings her partner Coach Mo with her. She allows Orange team (Daniel and Shay) to stay together on the new Black team, but splits all the other pairs apart and stacks her team with stronger competitors. However, and no offense to Bob cause he's my favorite, but Bob has never trained the winner of TBL, so don't get too down Black!

In the first challenge, Black teams wins and gets videos from home- yawn! At the weigh-in, however, Black team overcomes the odds and wins the weigh in! Ding dong, the Witch is dead! But NO. That moron Coach Mo points out he is injured and had the lowest weight-loss so he tells him team to vote him off and they comply. What is with these people basically quitting the game? I guarantee Tracy will be around for a long time, at least until they play as individuals. Way to go Blue team. I think I need to eat a donut in frustration.

Top Chef - This week is all about food pairings, and what better way to display pairings than a Quickfire that involves pairing a product placement item (Alexia chips). Both of the brothers worked for the guest judge, Charlie Palmer, so try hard to prove their worth, but it's Eli who finally gets a win. But the pairings don't stop here! Pig and pinot is this week's theme: create a pork dish paired with a pinot noir. The top 4 are the same as usual (Kevin, Cutthroat Bitch, the Brothers), with Kevin, a self proclaimed pork master, winning again. Is he the most winning TC contestant yet? The bottom 3 are the clear 3 worst there: Robin, Ash, and Laurine. Laurine's dish was compared to cat food, Robin had hardly any pork in a pig challenge, and Ash sucked as usual. While all the cheftestants (and me) would love to see Robin finally go, it's Ash falling on the knife this week.

Survivor - No season is complete without a gross food challenge, so the reward challenge is to drink disgusting smoothies made from revolting guts, etc. and the 1st team to get 5 smoothies down vomit-free wins a BBQ. Ashley chokes for Foa Foa, and Galu regains their winner title. Galu's leader, other Russell, has to send a tribe member to Foa Foa and sends a pissed off Shambo, claiming it's because she lost a chicken and not because she's the old lady outsider with a mullet. Of course, he didn't consider sending the girl who lost them immunity last week, but whatevs.

Over at Foa Foa, Shambo decides to share her immunity idol clues and search, which puts Russell in a panic. Liz confronts Russell, saying she thinks he has the idol and he flips out at this "false accusation." Not all is well at Galu either: with all this steak to make, there's no fire and other Russell won't listen to Dave's advice (and seeing as Dave as the only person with fire skills, smart move). Russell finally caves and let's Dave successfully start a fire, showing me that is Dave goes home, Galu will freeze and starve.

Morale is down on both tribes pre-immunity challenge because it's been raining nonstop. Galu and their frighteningly pruny hands win yet again, and Foa Foa gets a chance to dry off at Tribal Council. Since no one can scramble for votes out in the rain, there's an uncomfortable chat in the shelter to try and decide who should go. The final decision is everyone should vote however they want, which seems split between Liz and Ashley. After a Tribal Council discussion on trust, Ashley gets her torch snuffed by the warm, rain-free fire. Next week: man/woman down!

Project Runway - Confession: growing up I had a large collection Barbie dolls and there were none more glamorous than the Bob Mackie dolls, so when I find out this week is a Bob Mackie challenge (no not that Mr. Mackey), I get pretty pumped because I am picturing headpieces, sequins, and fabulousness. Bob Mackie is the king of costume couture, so the challenge is to create an extravagant stage look for Christina Aguilera. Nicholas is ecstatic and meeting Bob Mackie has been a lifelong dream, and I love his little white dress that to me looks so Christina. The winner is surprisingly Carol Hannah, who struggled originally on the challenge; her black dress is a total showstopper. Gordana is lucky she has immunity because her hot mess would've totally gone home. Christopher is, as always, confident in how amazing his look is, but it's actually a horrible recycled version of 2001 Christina. He yet again survives elimination which frustrates me to no end. This week goes to show that 1 bad look and you are out: season front-runner Shirin and her awful black evening gown are eliminated, and yes I gasped.

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