Serving of the Week

Name: Paula Deen

SERVED: This Thanksgiving, Paula Deen was doing some charity work for Hosea Feed the Hungry in Georgia. Well I guess Paula was too busy mingling that she didn't notice a ham getting thrown into her face. Dinner is SERVED! I love my Paula Deen, but I couldn't help but laugh (and what else to be thankful for than the joy of laughter?) Enjoy the hilarity of Paula Deen getting hit in the face with a ham. (via Dlisted)

Think someone should get SERVED? Leave your ideas in the comments section, email me, or hit me up on Twitter.

Movie Scene Sunday: Addams Family Values

If you're like me, chances are you are still living on Thanksgiving leftovers, mainly pie and cookies. If only Thanksgiving indulgence could last forever. Let's make Turkey Day last just a little bit longer with a movie clip!

People that say all sequels suck clearly haven't seen Addams Family Values, which is (in my opinion) far better than the original movie version. It's got the hilarious Joan Cusack (insert my brother and dad making fun of me), and great references to the terror that is "Heal the World" and Amy Fisher. If you'd like a song stuck in your head all day celebrating the origin of Thanksgiving and the deliciousness of turkey, sprinkled with anarchy and hatred of yuppies, boy is this then movie for you.

Reality Rundown: Time For You To Tango Home

The Amazing Race • The Biggest Loser • So You Think You Can Dance

The Amazing Race - The remaining 4 teams fly to Prague where unfortunately they do not have an absinthe drinking challenge. Instead they search for a "vintage Praga" (car) which leads them to a Detour of either kayaking a whitewater training course or pull themselves over the water on a suspended rope. The brothers think they can ace the kayaking, but keep falling in the water, so fall into 3rd place. They also decide to amp up their hate factor by stealing Brian/Ericka's cab. The fun part of the race is the Roadblock, which is to find a teeny mandolin in the opera house. This allows Flight Time some time to relax and perform his sweet ballet moves which Big Easy searches. Meghan/Cheyne are team #1 again, despite Cheyne being a turd this leg. Brian/Ericka are behind the pack and check in last, but it's another non-elimination leg (as it always is at the 4), so next week is do or die for them.

The Biggest Loser - It's the last week on campus and all the losers want to be in the final 4. Everyone is nervous about going home because without the ranch, they go back to their lives and families and workout time is scarce. Bedazzled jacket lover Suze Orman comes to campus to explain that health and wealth go together; I fast forward. But the losers answer some trivia to win money, so everyone is pleased. In another challenge, Allen wins tickets to the NFL Pro Bowl and $5k for a school of his choice. My personal favorite moment is when Danny broke out his guitar and played a song about their experience; I'm pretty sure it was this song. Allen and Liz fall below the yellow line, and outsider Amanda is the swing vote. She decides that her bond with Liz is stronger and she'd rather really fight in the end, rather than an easy win with Allen. Allen goes home and requests a new fire fighter nickname that doesn't revolve around his former fatness.

So You Think You Can Dance - This week decides who the top 10 will be and therefore who goes on the SYTYCD tour. It also means the couples split up and go into key party mode to pick a partner. This saddens me most because I realized while I love Ryan/Ellenore, Ashley/Jacob are the best partnership. Together they do a totally sexy cha cha and a beautiful lyrical jazz. New favorite! Too bad they break up this week. Noelle/Russell perform a great contemporary piece, but an awkward samba. It's pretty obvious Karen/Victor will be in the bottom again, with a weak hip hop and a good tango; the audience is just not cliquing with them. Nathan/Mollee will probably join them; I thought their hip-hop came off as immature and the French can can was odd. Putting the 2 babies in the competition together has not helped them. Bottom 3 prediction: Karen/Victor, Russell/Noelle, Nathan/Mollee.

Results show. There's a crazy opening group number that ends up being by Napoleon and Tabitha. Onto the results. Bottom 3 are Karen/Victor, Nathan/Mollee, and Ryan/Ellenore. I'm surprised about Ryan/Ellenore because both numbers they did were strong, but broadway and lindy hop aren't styles that get you calling in. It's pretty obvious who will/do go home: Karen and Victor (but we were so close to finally ditching Nathan).

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving Mel Got Served readers! I'm sure you each will individually thank me at your Thanksgiving meal for providing you humor and supplementing your reality TV addiction. And I'm thankful you're actually reading my blabbering! May your Thanksgiving be filled with turkey, family, fun, maybe popcorn and jellybeans, and of course WVU beating Pitt.

Serving of the Week

Name: Charles "Chuck" Pratt Jr., ex-headwriter of All My Children

SERVED: In case you didn't know, I'm a soap fan. I kind of dabble in all the ABC/NBC soaps, but since some time in college my soap of choice has been All My Children (in part to the hilarious Pine Valley Podcast). Now soaps are outlandish and have their ups and downs, but about a year ago, this show went down the shitter, ruining classic characters, horrible storylines, and hiring some of the worst "talent" in years. The main culprit behind the destruction of our soap: headwriter Chuck Pratt.

This moron decided to focus on horrible plots that destroyed characters, rather than building a rich canvas characters and the struggles life brings. He bragged to the media about his groundbreaking storylines, such as the first lesbian wedding, only to have the marriage annulled 3 days later. He then went of the defense and blamed one of the actors for this turn in storyline- what a toolbag. Taking a page from the old murder mystery book, he had a twin kill his brother, one of the kindest, gentlest, voice of reasons the show had. If you're not an AMC fan (which I know most of you aren't), it probably seems stupid to be upset, especially at a soap (which many view as trivial). But soaps are a form of escapism with characters you really bond with, so when a show you get attached to, is being ruined by one person, you want that person to pay.

Well the day has come, ABC has sacked Chuck Pratt! Soap fans are rejoicing, hoping to get AMC back to it's glory (especially before it's 4oth anniversary). So to you Chuck Pratt I say you got SERVED. SERVED by ABC (finally!) and SERVED by the fans who you have betrayed. I hope you never touch another soap, because you sir, suck.

Think someone should get SERVED? Leave your ideas in the comments section, email me, or hit me up on Twitter.

Movie Scene Sunday: Teen Wolf

This week the extremely over-hyped, Entertainment Weekly cover dominating movie New Moon from the Twilight "saga" came out (and no, I didn't see it. Twilight ain't my thang). This sequel's trailers are all hyping the extremely dreamy underage werewolf boy, Jacob. Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? To that I say: NONE. I am on Team SCOTT HOWARD. Yeah, the original Teen Wolf. If you're a werewolf and decide to take the route of being a pansy, at least be the coolest dude in school on the basketball team, scoring hot chicks, and wearing Saturday Night Fever suits to school dances.

Reality Rundown: Tiebreakin' all the Rules

The Amazing Race • The Biggest Loser • So You Think You Can Dance •
Top Chef • Survivor • Project Runway

The Amazing Race - I takes like 2 days of the race for the teams to get to this week's destination: Estonia. The Roadblock is to search for a hidden ink message in some secret society's headquarters. Matt struggles because he doesn't know what a candelabra is- d'oh. Maybe he's too relaxed from the Speed Bump he and his dad had to take in a Saunabus? The Detour is to score 5 points in mud volleyball or shoot vegetables with a slingshot at a target. Meghan & Cheyne win yet another leg- yawn. The Brothers are sick of the Globetrotters and in a foot race, one of them throws out an elbow to knockout Flight Time. Big Easy is pissed, and so am I. Deal with it brothers, the Globetrotters are amazing! Matt and his dad Gary finish the slingshot detour, but are last to check in and Philiminated from the race.

The Biggest Loser - Makeovers! Everyone looks great, makes an inspirational speech, and gets to see their family. And Rudy has a way hot, skinny wife. Then he wins a trip for his family to a Biggest Loser weight-loss resort, which I'm sure his skinny wife will enjoy. Because much of the week was spent getting glammed up, Bob and Jillian have less time to train the losers. The men have great numbers this week, with Rudy and Danny losing double digits again. Liz and Rebecca fall under the yellow line, but Liz's initial plea to stay is pretty weak. Rebecca passionately pleas for Rudy and Allen to keep her on the ranch, but Rudy decides to vote her out, citing her past alliance with the Black team. Rebecca's devastated to hear this, but now that she's working out at home she's smokin'! Oh, oh- and she and Daniel (last week's castoff) are in LOVE!

So You Think You Can Dance - Good dancing is back this week! However, 2 hours is unnecessary; it's just really long and repetitive judge rambling. Put in a group routine if you have to fill time. Ryan/Ellenore have an amazing rebound after last week's hip hop debacle; their contemporary piece is beautiful. Ashley/Jacob are awesome in their hip hop and Legacy/Kathryn perform a strong and powerful paso doble. Nathan/Mollee were good, but I can't tolerate the fact that Nathan will go far based on looks. The only couple in real danger is Kevin/Karen, who had a personality-less Broadway. Bottom 3 prediction: Kevin/Karen, Channing/Victor, and Russell/Noelle.

Results show! The bottom 3 are Kevin/Karen, Channing/Victor, and Mollee/Nathan. Score! Looks like there's some Nathan backlash; however, their solos are both outstanding and they're safe. I think it's pretty obvious Kevin is out this week, and he even looks defeated. For the girls, personality vs. technical becomes the big issue and the judges decide that Karen could be a star, so Channing is out. Victor and Karen as a pair? This seems no good.

Top Chef - Apparently there are culinary competitions besides Food Network Challenge, and the true masters of the culinary world compete in the Bocuse D'Or, which is like a culinary Olympics. For the Quickfire, the chefs have to create a dish of a protein inside a protein inside another protein- cue turducken jokes. My girl Jen formerly known as Cutthroat Bitch gets her groove back and wins with calamari, salmon and scallops.

The elimination challenge is to create a platter like the Bocuse d'or with one protein and two garnishes, which should be real snazzy; and the protein choices are salmon or lamb. Kevin makes a delicious dish, but perhaps not as difficult or elaborate as others; however, he wins yet again and this time gets $30k and the a chance to be part of the next Bocuse d'Or team for America. Eli's lamb was cooked crappy and his sausage had a lot of fat so he packs his knives and goes. So the final 4 is in fact the final 4 we all expected to happen since like episode 2. Jen or Kevin FTW!!

Survivor - Russell, Natalie, Laura, Dave and Brett win a reward challenge where they get a picnic lunch, extreme product placement with a Sprint phone, and clue to the next immunity idol. It's a frenzy at camp to find that idol, which is hidden under a green mossy rock; Russell decides to take off like a bat out of hell and confuse Dave and returns to a spot where they were both looking a FINDS THE IDOL. For a 3rd time. This guy rules.

Mick wins individual immunity, but he wasn't a target anyways: Laura is. The 4 Foa Foa's are voting Laura and so is Shambo, so that makes 5 votes; the Galus decide to vote Natalie and then attempt to make the Foa Foa's waste their votes on John. John gets wind of this and is pissed that his tribe would gamble with his life in the game. He approaches Russell, who knows Galu is trying to mess with them, and offers him a deal: when it's a tie, the 2nd time they vote, switch votes and get rid of Laura. If a tie is forced twice, everyone has to draw rocks and whoever has the purple rock goes home. Talk about leaving it up to fate. John decides to consider it, but says if he agrees next week a Foa Foa has to go home.

At Tribal Council, there's a 5-5 tie between Laura and Natalie. Dave, who thinks he's so GD smart and really irritates me, gets cocky and says he'll keep the tie to draw rocks. The tribe revotes again (except Laura and Natalie) and the votes come out 6-4 and Laura is out. John switched his tiebreaker vote- awesome. Dave looks so confused that it's priceless. Man Survivor, you're on fire!

Project Runway - I thought this day would never come: the end. This season has been a bore and I'm seriously considering not coming back to next season when it starts in January.

Anyways, the designers rush to finish their 13th look and touch up their collection. Let's get onto the Bryant Park shows. Althea is first and says her collection is inspired by sci-fi movies. It's some nice sportswear and knits, with a lot of pieces that could be mixed and matched. Carol Hannah is second and hers is full of really beautiful dresses and actually uses color, but the looks aren't cohesive. Irina is last, citing New York and shielding/protection as her inspiration; the looks are all black and gray with a lot of leather pants. Judges discuss, blah blah blah, and it's so obvious who will win. Irina is the winner of Project Runway 6- can you hear that? It's the sound of no one caring. After a lackluster season, it's even more disappointing for the season villain to win.

Reading Rules! Part 2

If you thought the novelization of Home Alone 2 or an original episode of Family Ties in book form was great, wait til you see these books. This next showcase of books doesn't have a central tying theme like last time, but if I could theme them I'd just call them "AMAZING." These books leave me speechless, while also wondering who in the world wasted their time writing these and what publisher in their right mind said, "This will make millions!"

Since it's "the latest scoop," does this mean there's a sequel?
Time to scour eBay.

This book is all about the title, mainly because "Electric Star"
perfectly describes Debbie Gibson. Once shining and full of energy but quickly
burned out and needed a replacement. SERVED!

I anticipated this being full of knock knock jokes and lame riddles. What I
found instead was pun-filled artwork, like Pac-Man on Hollywood Squares
or Old PacDonald. I bet this won a Pulitzer.

This might become my favorite book of all-time. I can just imagine a bunch
of teen girls circa 1982 at a sleepover reading Matt Dillon facts and
trying to guess trivia like what turns Matt on (and his answer would be:
unofficial quiz books with odd personal facts written by teen fangirls).

Reading Rules! Part 1

It's pretty obvious that if you blog about pop culture, then you probably love TV and movies. I used to read a lot more books, but I must admit I don't read as much as I should (my train time's for napping, not learning!) We're all very familiar with the concept of a beloved novel being turned into a movie, like Harry Potter or He's Just Not That Into You (ha!) But did you know sometimes the reverse happens? That's right- sometimes they decide that watching a show or movie isn't enough and they write book book-versions of said entertainment. How awesome is that? (Not that awesome. Seems unoriginal.)

This past week, my amiga Jamie and I took a voyage to the used section of Paperback Junction and are happy to report back some of the amazingness we were able to find. And don't worry folks, this is a 2 part series. Come back later this week for the greatest books I've ever found.

It's a never-before-seen-episode in novel form! Now I wonder what
"the business" Alex gets is... start pondering.

I would've preferred reading the original Home Alone, but at least this version
let's me skip any visuals of that pigeon woman.

There seems to be a Michael J. Fox theme in terms of screen-to-book.
However, Adventures in Babysitting confuses me. It says it's a book based
on the movie, but also says that this book is "Now a Major Motion Picture."
Which is it? I need to know!!!

I want to enlarge this picture, print it, frame it, and hang it in my
future home for generations to come.

Serving of the Week

Name: Oldies 103.3

SERVED: It is November 16, which is a month and a half before Christmas. This weekend, I embarked upon a Saturday shopping trip with my friend Jamie and figured we'd have a good time, hear some great one hit wonders, etc. Well color me furious when I tuned into my favorite Boston-area radio station, Oldies 103.3 aka WODS Boston. (And yes, I know I'm 25 and mainly listen to oldies music, but there's only so many times you can listen to Lady Gaga without it turning into road rage).

On Saturday November 14, I turned to 103.3 and it was playing Christmas music. Not just one song; their entire programming is Christmas music. 2 weeks before Thanksgiving. WHAT THE HELL! Listen, I get people want some yuletide cheer but even the Christmas-fanatics I know wait until after Thanksgiving. Oldies 103.3, I SERVE you this Monday to tell you that I, a loyal listener, am PISSED. First the rock station is switched to sports talk, now Christmas music 3 weeks earlier than normal- radio sucks. I hope your radio ratings tank for trying to force this holiday music so early. Now where will I get my Captain & Tennille fix?

Think someone should get SERVED? Leave your ideas in the comments section, email me, or hit me up on Twitter.

Movie Scene Sunday: Singin' in the Rain

This weekend stinks. Despite a fun day shopping for Sweet Valley High books and Ikea goodies with Jamie, my cold has gotten worse, leaving me so congested and coughing like I have the black lung. And to top that, it won't stop raining. On a rainy day (and especially when sick), it's good to kick back with a favorite movie so I'll be spending this Sunday with Gene Kelly while he's "Singin' in the Rain." Hopefully the rain is done, but if it keeps going, I'll let Gene be the one to enjoy it.

Reality Rundown: Orange You Sad You Fell Below the Yellow Line?

The Amazing Race • The Biggest Loser • So You Think You Can Dance •
Top Chef • Survivor • Project Runway

The Amazing Race - Teams board 2 different flights to Stockholm, Sweden where street names become everyone's nightmare. When there, they ride a steep drop ride at an amusement park, then get to carry around a sweet Travelocity Roaming Gnome (I have 1 3 of those!) the rest of the leg (the Globetrotters name theirs "Harlem Gnome:). The Detour is a choice between blowing shizz up or deciphering Viking code; I think you can guess which option every team picked. Now onto the fun part: the Roadblock. In season 6, the worst Roadblock ever involved having to find a clue hidden in haysbales; 1 contestant spent 10 hours searching and never found it and was eliminated while still searching. So this season, it's back to torture again! The Globetrotters find luck on their side again and get to be team #1 on Flight Time's birthday. The father/son team are the last to check in, but luck comes in to play again as it's a non-elimination leg.

The Biggest Loser - Alison drops on a bomb on the losers that there will be 2 lines this week: a yellow and a red line. Whoever falls below the yellow line is up for elimination, and the person below the red line is automatically eliminated. Double elimination beotches! Bob and Jillian have a heart-to-heart and agree that Shay needs to be here most (ominous foreshadowing), but know they need to push everyone to their limits. Allen wins a 1lb advantage at a pop challenge and Rudy wins immunity in another challenge.

At the weigh-in, the numbers are ridiculous! Shay drops 17lbs and becomes the fastest 100lbs dropped by a woman in BL history. It's old Liz who shocks everyone and is BL of the week. After a lot of suspense, returning loser Daniel falls below the red line and is eliminated. Other young'ns Amanda and Shay (despite her double-digit drop) are below the yellow line and the game is finally played, with Shay being eliminated and both ex-orange teams members out the same week. And yes, she cried a lot this episode. What I liked most? At her welcome home party, someone brought cupcakes the size of the Hulk's fist.

So You Think You Can Dance - Maybe I'm being a hater this week cause I'm feeling under the weather, but this week the dancing sucked. My favorites Ryan & Ellenore tanked in a Lil C hip-hop; far too cutesey for a hardcore routine. Mollee & Nathan's salsa is painful to watch. Legacy is great, but his partner danced like a 5 year old in a dance recital. The only bright point for me tonight was Russell and Noelle's fantastic Afro-jazz. There were a few others that were good, but just didn't make me excited. It's probably also not a good thing to give a C- performance when the voting is finally in America's hands. It was not a fun 2 hours when you're aching, coughing, and watching crappy dancing. Bottom 3 prediction: Ryan/Ellenore, Mollee/Nathan, Victor/Channing.

Results show! Nigel seems peeved before the results have been announced (since the judges know the votes beforehand), so my guess is Nathan/Mollee avoided the bottom 3 despite being dreadful. And I'm right. The bottom 3 are Ryan/Ellenore, Peter/Pauline, and shockingly Kevin/Karen. Nigel then blasts the viewers for voting for Nathan because he's cute and not because his dance was good. What I realized? Nathan+15 years+Ed Hardy shirt=Jon Gosselin. Anyways, after some mediocre solos, Nigel again gets pissy saying that season 5 was not long ago and they need to step up their game. The judges decide to eliminate Peter and Pauline, and with that all the tappers are out and some soundguy's job just got easier.

Top Chef -Padma and famous food personality Nigella Lawson call the chefs for breakfast in bed in their swanky Venetian room, so the chefs get 30 minutes to whip up something tasty for this Quickfire. Eli wins with his play on eggs benedict, while Robin sucks again.

The elimination challenge is to draw knives and create a dish designed by a different hotel on the Vegas strip. Robin gets Bellagio and has never heard of it, proving that she must live on another planet. I've visited each of the hotels on the strip and stayed in a few, so I'm excited to see what inspires the cheftestants. Brother Michael wins the challenge this week with his New York, New York inspired chicken wing and blue cheese (Brother Brian's Mandalay Bay and Kevin's Mirage are the other top dishes). Jen's Excalibur steak is like a rock, Robin's panna cotta isn't executed well, and Eli's Circus Circus peanut/apple soup topped with ground-up popcorn and raspberry froth is downright disgusting. The judges decide to eliminate Robin, and I yell "Finally!" at my TV. Maybe if she wasn't so distracted by the artwork, Robin would've seen Bellagio has some of the best chocolate ever. Peace out!

Survivor - Hunger is finally turning the survivors crazy, as southern sweetie Natalie kills a rat and they eat it. Yum! Dave, Shambo, Monica, John, and Kelly (dreadlock girl) win the Reward Challenge and get to go ass sliding down some rocks and eat fried chicken and brownies. While on the trip, there's a clue that there's a new immunity idol hidden back at camp, so the 5 decide to keep this information within Galu and pick off the former Foa Foas. However, Russell doesn't need no stinkin' clue to know that there's an idol hidden out there and he finds it- AGAIN. Russell may be a manipulator and jerk, but man is he awesome. Russell decides to confide in Shambo and reveal the idol, and a new play is in motion: play the idol again and blindside Laura.

Except Laura wins immunity again, so the plan changes. Foa Foa decides to vote for Kelly to weaken Laura's alliance, knowing that Galu will all plan on voting off Russell. Russell will then play his new idol and boom- serving time! While Monica suggests maybe Galu should split their votes in case someone does have an idol, Dave nixes that idea. So at Tribal Council, where Foa Foa plays possum and Galu thinks they're 7 strong, Russell plays his idol and Kelly is completely blindsided- just when I finally learned her name. This is amazing Survivor! Oh and Jeff announces that the idol will be rehidden so next week: game on!

Project Runway - Heidi sends the 3 designers home with $9K to work on their Bryant Park collections, having to create 12 pieces. Tim Gunn visits each girl to check out their progress and meet their family and make biscuits (yes, it happened). There seems to be optimism about each collection, but then Irina gets a shocker when Tim informs her she can't use some screenprint of Coney Island she has because the images are trademarked.

Time magically flies by, the designers come to New York City for Fashion Week, but Carol Hannah is delayed since she's super sick. There's some minor cattiness, more Tim critiques, model selection, and a tete-a-tete with Michael and Nina. It's really not exciting. Heidi shows up to "shock" them with a last minute challenge, having to create a 13th look and this would be shocking if they haven't done this every single season. Crying Christopher, Gordana, and Logan return to be assistants and Carol Hannah gets sick again. Next week: this dull-as-rocks season finally ends.

Welcome Metro Shout Out Readers!

If you're new to the blog today, chances are you read the free Metro Boston newspaper this morning, checked out the Shout Outs section and saw "MELGOTSERVED.COM," got curious, and stopped by. If that's the case: WELCOME! (and if you got here through Google for something like "Can I feed my puppy chicken nuggets?" - the answer is probably no, but welcome to you too!)

I pick up the Metro every day to scan the headlines and do the crossword... until the Metro Shout Outs began. It's an addiction; not just reading them, but submitting them. So I submitted a couple inside joke-ish Michael Bolton song quotes for a good laugh. I then thought to myself, "Hey, why not try the Shout Outs to try and promote my little blog." And then it was printed. AWESOME!

So to the new readers, I hope you check out my posts and come back tomorrow for the Reality Rundown, and then again and again until you're addicted to my blog like I'm addicted to Metro Shout Outs.

Is Your Uno Too Masculine?

Unless you lived on Mars or in a third world nation during your childhood, chances are you've played and loved the game Uno. Apparently I loved it so much that I wrote in my 6th grade yearbook that I'd put Uno in a time capsule to commemorate the good times of 1996. I'd play during recess, I'd play at home with friends, and even as an adult it's fun as hell. It's competitive, fast-paced, allows you to yell really loud, be completely vindictive and spiteful, and everyone likes it. Or so I thought.

One complaint I've never heard about Uno is, "It's too manish!" I bet you're reading this thinking, "WTF are you talking about, Melissa?" At a recent trip to Toys R Us (yes I still frequent that store, and it's fantastic for browsing), I was checking out the board game aisle and stumbled across this "gem": UNO CHIC.

Are girls too appalled by the bright primary colors of the original game? Does calling it "chic" really make it fashionable? Listen, I'm in marketing so I get that you need to come up with new ways to sell products, but this seems kinda ridiculous. Oh and don't think Uno is alone in the trend. Why not try the cuter version of these classics:

Serving of the Week

Name: Erik, Survivor: Samoa

SERVED: Never count out the underdogs in Survivor. Erik did this week and got totally SERVED. Y'see, on Survivor this week the 2 tribes merged, with Galu (Erik's tribe) having 8 members, while Foa Foa only had 4. Erik's decision was for Foa Foa to be picked off week by week, but decided he was OK with one of his lady tribemates leaving, but then bossed around 3 Foa Foa members to the point that they started a revolution. At Tribal Council, Erik was none the wiser and assumed he was safe and he was in control of this game. Until the votes were read. Erik got totally SERVED with the 1st really good blindside this season. I guess Outboss isn't part of the Survivor tagline.

Think someone should get SERVED? Leave your ideas in the comments section, email me, or hit me up on Twitter.

Movie Scene Sunday: The Goonies

Yesterday I went to a sweet birthday party at Plaster Fun Time where I painted a fantastic cupcake that's so realistic you'd chip your tooth on it. Plaster and statues don't necessarily get a lot of play in the movies, but my all-time favorite movie, The Goonies, has a fantastic scene involving the accidental destruction of a statue. As a kid, I had a videotape of the movie from the Disney Channel so it didn't include this scene (but it did contain the famous octopus deleted scene), so it was quite a blunder when I one time I brought my brand-new 1998 copy of the Goonies on VHS to a babysitting job and the kids got to see this full-frontal art blunder. Enjoy!

Warning! Contains artistic nudity.

Reality Rundown: Foa Against Eight

The Amazing Race • The Biggest Loser • So You Think You Can Dance • Top Chef •
Survivor • Project Runway

The Amazing Race - Buh-bye Dubai, hello Netherlands! The gay brothers announced to the group they're gay and come in 1st place this leg. The Road Block requires counting bells as they annoyingly ring; it's a breeze for everyone except Erica, who apparently took about 3 hours to complete this and puts her and her hubbie way behind.

The Detour is shitty either way you go: wearing traditional Dutch clothing, teams must either ring a bell with a hammer (like the carnival game), learn a dance, and eat a nasty trout or strip down to their undies, cross a river, and play wacky Dutch golf. In my opinion, both challenges put females at a disadvantage. Clearly, the dancing option would be easier for women, but to even enter the task they have to ring the carnival bell which are virtually impossible for an average woman. Needless to say, poker players Maria & Tiffany struggle and attempt each detour twice. Their misfortune allows Brian & Erica to catch up and avoid elimination, despite a 30 minute penalty for not following the clue's exact instructions. Maria & Tiffany have to give up and are Philiminated on the windy golf course. Sucks for them since the Detour blew, but Maria has done jack-shit the whole time (yet said she always gave 150%) and they came in last twice but escaped elimination due to a non-elimination leg and Zev & Justin's passport mishap. Adios ladies!

The Biggest Loser - The goal of this week is to inspire America to be fit so they send them to Washington, DC to do this. Alison Sweeney also reveals teams are gone: it's individuals, baby! Liz wins a pop challenge (by bragging she's the old lady contestant) to get people to come work out with Bob & Jillian at the Washington Monument and eat Subway. The losers get to visit the White House, where pick vegetables from Michelle Obama's garden and make a salad in the White House kitchen. But I guess that's closer than I've been, so good for them. For a chance at the immunity, the contestants run a mile, carry pennies, and balance in front of historical monuments; Rebecca wins (good thing, cause she would've been below the yelow line). Jillian finally gets a chance to revenge-train Tracy, but nothing good happens and instead Jillian says Tracy has changed- boring! At the weigh-in, in front of Lincoln Memorial, Liz and Crazy Eyes Tracy fall below the yellow line. Tracy's past of being an untrustworthy gamer comes back to haunt her and she's eliminated. Goodbye season villain!

So You Think You Can Dance -Kind of an unbalanced week, but I do have an official favorite couple: Ellenore & Ryan, who do such a fantastic Argentenian tango even with Ellenore's dress stuck on her heel. Karen & Kevin ace a raunchy hip-hop which may have simulated salad tossing, and Legacy & Kathryn hit it out of the park again this week with contemporary. And here's a sidenote: You know you have a cool mom when she makes the comment that Legacy looks like Matsuflex from Tool Academy. Onto the clunkers: Channing & Phillip have a horrible samba; the judges compliment her hip action, but I thought she was so rigid and uncomfortable. Bianca & Victor's "Praise the Lord!" Broadway is bad, Russell & Noelle's tennis themed hip-hop is weak for Noelle, and Peter & Pauline have to dance to a weird Wade Robson piece based on Van Gogh's "Starry Night" that is just too odd for me (but others surely love).

Due to the World Series, the judges again will select the Bottom 4 and send home 2. The bottom 4 are Noelle, Bianca, Phillip, and Victor. Again, I think it's BS that it's not pairs in the bottom (especially since Channing sucked as bad as Phillip), but I'll have to deal with that. Bianca does the most ridiculous solo to "Tootsie Roll" by 69 Boyz, which leaves me rolling in laughing from the memories of 6th grade dances. The judges make the decision to send Bianca and Phillip, 2 of the 3 tap dancers home. They both cry, the other dancers cry, Cat Deeley cries; my mom cheers (she didn't like Bianca).

Top Chef - No new episode! Boo! But instead we get a reunion of former favorite finalists, hosted by season 5's amazing Fabio, who cook dinner for themselves and argue. Here's what you need to know: season 2's Marcel is still an immature douche and Fabio puts him in check, Crazy Carla doesn't blame her sous chef from the finale (Casey from Season 3) for her loss, and bitter Lisa from season 4 isn't as bad, doesn't mind being the villain, and didn't burn any rice. They reminiscence about old challenges, fights, and how the judges can be pretty rude. I also fall in love with Stefan from Season 5 for his kinda douchey humor and swoon over the cooking god that is Richard Blais. So, great to see everyone, but kinda dull.

Survivor - Foa Foa may be down to 4 members, but fate smiles on them this week as the merge happens, forming the Aiga tribe. Galu is confident that their 8 can pick off the Foa's 1-by-1, but the Foas are smart and know they need to fight their way to stay; there are cracks in Galu, and they'll open them up. Russell's definition of fighting to stay includes revealing his hidden immunity idol to 3 different Galuse and vowing that each of them is his final 2 member. Laura isn't buying what he's selling and neither is Monica; cute John decides he's in. Now that Laura is onto Russell, she becomes Russell's target and John and Shambo are both in to take her out. Well as fate would have it, Laura and John both win individual immunity (a guy and a girl get it), so now it's time to game play.

The scrambling post-Immunity Challenge is so awesome and leaves me on the edge of my seat. Galu wants to flush out Russell's immunity idol, Monica becomes a target, then Jaison, and then overconfident Erik (who also has a hidden immunity idol, but told no one). At Tribal Council, Erik goes on and on about Galu being so tight and that Foa Foa is out the door, which makes Russell worry he could be his name on the parchment. After tallying the votes, Russell plays his hidden immunity idol, bringing smiles to everyone's face that Operation Idol-Flush is a success. However, Russell gets 0 votes. After 2 votes for Jaison, all the votes come out for Erik and he's totally blindsided and becomes the 1st member of the jury. HAHA! He had an immunity idol, but was so cocky he didn't play it and got served. THIS is why I still love Survivor.

Project Runway - Last challenge before Fashion Week. Thank god, cause I'm so bored with this show; are you? Tim brings the designers to the Getty Center where they are tasked to create a piece inspired by the museum's architecture and artwork. The Getty is quite beautiful and has some amazing art there, allowing everyone to find the inspiration they need, from European bedding to Monet, or in Christopher's case, rocks in the fountain with algae. This is symbolic of him being an outsider I guess? Annoying.

All the designs this week are pretty weak to me (well Carol Hannah makes a elegant, but safe, dress). Althea takes a risk but her dress is still a clunker. Since there are 5 left and only 3 get to compete at Fashion Week, 2 will be eliminated. After the initial critique, Heidi asks why each designer thinks they deserve to go to Fashion Week. This gives Christopher one last time to cry like a baby on the runway about how he's from a small town and wants this so much (does he realize that America has hundreds of thousands of really small towns with talented people?), and then makes himself so saintly because he chose to use rocks as an inspiration rather than fine art. He's eliminated- YAY! Despite Gordana's beautiful dress, it's too safe and no one knows where she's really coming from as a designer so she's out too. This leaves the 3 most talented, Carol Hannah, Althea, and Irina, to duke it out in NYC.

Happy Birthday Schroeder!

Today is the 1st birthday of my little puppy, Schroeder! It seems like only yesterday I got him as a tiny puppy, and how he's a gentle giant that runs on dog treats. I guess he's no longer a puppy but a man-dog. Let's celebrate his special day with an obnoxious Blingee.

Personalized Glitter Graphics

Serving of the Week

Name: My Car Windshield

SERVED: Last Monday, I awoke nice and early to get ready for work. About 10 minutes before my departure, I went outside to defrost my car window. I get into my car to put the keys in the ignition and see my entire windshield caving in below the ice because someone smashed my windshield. SERVED. Now I've had my car windows smashed before outside my house, but this one had a twist: a pumpkin was hurled at the windshield. SERVED. We found some pumpkin remnants outside and weighed a piece that was about 1/3 of the pumpkin and it was 6 1/2lbs! Whaaaaat! Those little SOBs with their Halloween time shenanigans. As much as I wanted to SERVE some reality star or pop culture figure, it's clear that this week me and my poor Honda CRV got SERVED. Good thing Massachusetts covers windshields in our insurance!

Honorable Mention: Melissa Joan Hart on Jimmy Kimmel Live for her post-Dancing with the Stars elimination interview (Watch the amazingness now!)

Think someone should get SERVED? Leave your ideas in the comments section, email me, or hit me up on Twitter.