August 13, 2010

Reality Rundown: It's Pronounced "NeanderTALL"

8/13/2010 Posted by Mel Got Served , 3 comments
Big Brother 12 - Week 5

The show really knows how to drag out an HOH competition that took 30 hours to construct yet only lasted barely an hour. So Kathy opts to jump off the paint can first and be a Have Not, I guess for safety's sake yet no one was like "Hey Kathy, you're safe for taking the bullet!" Everyone else is holding on for as long as they can, meaning until Brendon falls off. Enzo drops second, but Rachel's constant "Go Brendon's!" don't help much and he falls. Yay! Brenchel going home this week! Rachel is pissed that Brendon loses HOH comps, therefore making her the bigger elimination target. The rest of the HGs begin to fall, leaving Matt and Ragan as the last 2 on the paint can, mirroring the last endurance competition. Ragan begins to consider giving the HOH to Matt again, leaving his hands clean, but sticks it out for a bit before falling. Matt is HOH for the second time, keeping the Brigade safe again.

Matt enters his HOH room to find Pandora's Box waiting for him in the HOH room and 2 notes. Note #1 explains it's Pandora's Box and there could be something good or something bad and he gets a preview of what's inside: it's the most beautiful, sparkly veto ever enclosed in a glass case. It looks like the Power of Veto form of Snooki's new crystal sunglasses on Jersey Shore. Envelope #2 explains this is the Diamond Power of Veto, the "most coveted veto on Big Brother" and it's his for the taking if he opens Pandora's Box, something bad could happen in return. Matt thinks aloud about the potential consequences, but none of us doubted for a second he would turn it down. Inside Pandora's Box, a final note explains the Diamond Power of Veto: the DPOV allows the holder to safe himself or anyone else from the block and name their replacement nominee, but it can only be used in the next 2 weeks and must be kept a secret. Matt begins to brag his now runs this house for 2 weeks.

Matt hides his DPOV and pulls out a dollar card from the first HOH competition ever, which he uses to make up a lie about what he found in Pandora's Box. He says the screen showed a briefcase which he assumed had a lot of money but only had the dollar; the house is suspect since that's a stupid lie. But now the house is on red alert because something bad is probably coming. And by bad, I mean lame because we know it's the stupid saboteur- but will Ragan accept?

Ragan is called to the Diary Room to find a notecard with his name on it informing him that Big Brother fans voted him the saboteur and for the next 2 weeks he must complete 3 sabotages a week and if he survives the next 2 weeks, he'll win $20k. Ragan is torn because it could affect him negatively in the game, but he's also flattered America chose him. What will he do, what will he do? Ragan accepts the task of saboteur. We're allowed to suggest sabotage suggestions and every idea I have involves destroying Rachel's extensions somehow.

Later in the episode, the TV screen in the living room starts going haywire and the house remembers this sound well: it's the saboteur. The saboteur thanks Matt for opening Pandora's Box and releasing the saboteur back into the game. His goal is to "destroy all of you and cruise to a half million dollars. Watch your back before I stab you in it." House paranoia sets in again and they all fear the saboteur. Last time all Annie did was put a stupid beeping noise in a bunch of rooms- oh god, how horrendous! Ragan has the worst guilty face and keeps kind of defending it yet so one says, "Why are you defending them?!"

Before nominations, Rachel approaches Matt and Ragan in the cabana room, sort of with a veiled threat that if Rachel and Brendon are nominated one of them will win the Power of Veto and be safe. Ragan begins to take offense that Rachel is insinuating he and Matt are a strategic pair and this sets him off. Ragan is tired of Rachel spouting all her bullshit, which some eventually believe as truth, so he sets he straight that he and Matt are aligned and in no one affect each other's game. Rachel is the one yelling, while Ragan takes an angry tone, and Matt just watches from the sidelines. Matt does pop in to point out that Brendon and Rachel can't have conversations without being attached at the hip, which is so true of this co-dependent showmance. Brenchel attempt to strike a deal with Matt since they are strong competitors, but Matt could care less about this attempt. Brendon and Rachel are put on the block each other again but this time one of them is definitely going home. Can you hear that? It's me jumping, clapping and hearing that this horrendous showmance is ending this week.

Brendon and Rachel spend most of the Tuesday episode pouting, whining, and being utterly annoying. Brendon sees how important it is to ol' Crocodile Tears to be in the game, so he plans to win the veto and save his lady love. They practice until 5:30 in the morning- surely they will win now! Last season's tolerable showmance Jeff and Jordan return to host the POV competition which is candlepin bowling, elimination style. First person bowls, then challenges another person; highest score stays in the game. Rachel gets up first and bowls a 6 and challenges Kathy, since she assumes she can beat Kathy. Kathy knocks down 7 pins and gives a "Wooo!" because as we know Kathy loses everything and for once she wins. Rachel gets all pissy about Kathy being happy about her losing. Brendon is second and knocks like 3 pins down and in a pissy rage, chucks a ball down the alley, almost hitting the hosts. Big baby. Once Brenchel are eliminated, the house has fun with the competition and Britney wins the POV.

After the POV, Rachel demands an apology from Kathy about her excitement for eliminating Rachel in the competition. Kathy, who up until this point I've said is a waste of space, defends herself aweseomely and refuses to apologize for being proud of herself. Kathy, this ballsy has redeemed yourself in my book. Rachel won't STFU and Hayden points out to her that she did the same thing last week with "Floaters grab a life vest!" But we all know Rachel is the center of the universe and we should all bow down to her.

Ragan gets his first saboteur task and opts for trying to turn Brendon and Rachel against each other with a video message claiming Brendon throws comps to keep the target on Rachel. They could care less, but the HGs think the saboteur is trying to get Brendon evicted rather than Rachel. Brendon decides he needs to make a drastic move to keep Rachel in the game, so in his POV speech, he completely rips into Britney and calls her a selfish spoiled brat. Britney isn't taking shit from that big baby and lays right into Brendon, pointing out his childish temper tantrum behavior. Britney leaves nominations the same and it's official: one of these 2 annoyances are being sent to the jury house.

Brendon and Rachel think his POV speech put the target on him, so he urges Rachel to try and make amends in the house so she can make alliances next week. Rachel talks to Hayden and Britney in the hammock and Ragan calmly explains to her how she has caused all the drama and turmoil in the house. Rachel gets up and leaves, sobbing a little. Brendon comes stomping across the lawn, yelling at Ragan and Britney for making Rachel cry again, calling Ragan a "f***cking douchebag." Ragan tells Brendon he doesn't even know what they were talking about and that he's an "early man, a Neanderthal." And it is at this moment, Brendon says the stupidest thing ever, "First of all, it's pronounced NeanderTALL." O. M. G. The argument ends because Britney and Ragan burst into laughter. What a moron. (Edit: apparently this pronunciation is accurate but I think what it goes to show is Brendon's personality of always having to be right and smartest)

The saboteur strikes again, leaving a message claiming that one of the people on the block might not get evicted and "love conquers all." Rachel is SO stoke for this, too bad it's all the saboteur which makes it awesome. The house is panicking though- what if one of these losers don't leave this week? OK saboteur, this was a good twist as it caused some major chaos in the house.

In other news, we found out Brendon was once engaged and she and her family are so relieved he's out of their lives. And suddenly, while watching Rachel and Brendon fight about her being "so Vegas" I realized what it is I hate about Rachel: her fake, overdramatic, playing up for cameras is a dead ringer for the stinkers in The Room. You are tearing me apart, Rachel! Despite Brendon trying to make another "fantastic" speech, attempting to out Matt's Pandora's box lie, and comparing himself to the Salem Witch Trials (you read that right), Rachel is voted out unanimously. SERVED SERVED SERVED. Unfortunately in her exit interview, Chenbot infers Rachel may not have seen the last of the Big Brother house and oh god if I have to tolerate that fire-headed weave anymore I'll go insane.

The HOH is another to be continued, with the HGs having to unravel ropes through a course and buzz in. Dear god, anyone but Brendon. Please, get the poison out of their system. The results are in and the new HOH is...



Photo Credits: BigBrotherLoop, BSideBlog, CBS.com, HauteLikeCouture, RealityBBQForums

3 comments:

WP said...

Ne·an·der·thal (n-ndr-thôl, -tôl, n-ändr-täl)

also Ne·an·der·tal (-tôl, -täl)

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.



Not to defend anyone on this show, but I mean, it's not like he was entirely wrong...

Anonymous said...

http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/homs/spelling.html

Anonymous said...

Brendan was correct in his pronunciation. The American pronunciation of the word - because of the spelling - has been butchered over time. It is a German word, named after a German valley. The correct and original pronunciation is TALL, and Brendan would obviously know that as a science major. If he were to pronounce it otherwise, he'd be laughed at by his peers in the scientific community.