October 8, 2010

Reality Rundown: True Life- I Had a Panic Attack Over Paper Cups

The Amazing RaceThe Biggest LoserSurvivor: Nicaragua
Top Chef: Just DessertsProject Runway

The Amazing Race - The teams head to the airport to fly from London to Accra, Ghana and all are on the same flight. The Ghana locals are very grabby into cabs trying to get money, which results in the a cappella guys getting spit on; they then sing request for their cabbie to drive faster. The clues send them to a ridiculously busy market where the route marker holds a Road Block. One team member will have to hock sunglasses amongst the local vendors. Brook, of the home shopping hosts, is psyched for a sales challenge and actually good at it (plus gives a kiss on the cheek). Chad's "sex appeal" strategy kinda works, except his customer refuses to give him one more cedi. Most teams are really struggling because the people at the market like to try on the glasses and dance in them on TV, but use the "you look like [famous American celebrity]" to seal the deal.

The teams begin to reach their 15 cedi goal and take their cabs to the Detour: install a TV antenna system to an owner's house or transport the most awesome coffins ever made. These coffins reflect their future occupants so there's giant cameras, lions- it is fantastic. I think I'd like a chimp or garden gnome (Travelocity gnome- product placement!). Brook/Claire (who installed the antenna) and Katie/Rachel (who moved the coffin) appear to be vying for 1st place, while the doctors are at the back of the pack. The marketplace where the Pit Stop is is insanely crowded, but Brook and Claire are team #1 and win a trip to Hawaii. I hope they have Dole Whips there. The remaining teams end up in a massive traffic jam, impeding their pit stop arrival. The doctors, once last, get an insane cab drive who cuts everyone off (same for the a cappella guys). It's a battle of families for the final spot to remain in the race: sadly, birth mother/daughter Andie and Jenna are the last team to check in. They're disappointed but it's more about getting to know each other.

The Biggest Loser - After pleading the night before to stay on campus, Tina announces to the group she's going to ask to go home. The house reaction is obvious: how selfish. She let a girl go home just to quit the next day. More information is revealed when Tina explains the day before she came to the BL ranch she withdrew $16k from her 401k to take her family on "the vacation of a lifetime." Wow- what an awesome reason. Then another chick, Lisa who was kind of Allie's partner, admits she wants to stick around another week or so and go home to help Allie compete her journey at home. Sorry, shouldn't you people want to be here? Perfect time for Bob to enter and get the 411 on the drama. Bob talks some sense into these morons that everyone has to be here, someone has to go home, get over it. Bob brings them to the gym to work them to the death, Curves style (1 minute at each station).

After their hardcore workout, where Bob makes a lesson out of a sass-mouthed Orange Jesse, Bob takes Tina aside. Bob lets Tina know how important it is her for to take this time for herself and get healthy for her family, as well as her self. He doesn't say the obvious reason: when she takes that vacation of a lifetime, she'll want a smokin' swimsuit bod. The next workout day, Jillian brings the women aside to give them a pep talk and get them psyched up for this game; being complacent is unacceptable. Mrs. Enrique Iglesias, Anna Kournikova, stops by the ranch to look thin and fit and work out the losers with some tennis drills. Anna leaves in time for a Pop Challenge with a prize of immunity: fill other losers' cylinders with tennis balls, last loser standing wins. Fredo (Black shirt) wins immunity.

Early weigh-in again- I love this! Having the weigh-in start during hour 1 is so fantastic; never stop this. Fredo, Brendon and Patrick have formed a bond, so decide to make a secret alliance. The yellow line is still set at the halfway mark this week, with the 8 below competing in the elimination challenge. Fredo only loses 3lbs but basically admits to the audience he played the game. Many contestants hit the week 2 blues, while some achieve greatness (no surprise, it's mostly guys with the good numbers). 5 (of 7) women fall below the yellow line and Blue Adam is declared Biggest Loser of the Week. There's another day of workouts and pep talks before the challenge- I didn't watch this much cause I really was psyched for The Good Wife. Adam chooses Aaron (Yellow) to be exempt from the elimination challenge since he definitely needs to be there. The elimination challenge is to find a brass ring in a pile of 175 tons of sand over and over until 2 people are left. The losers burrow for their ring, searching for the preciousssss. Another woman will go home this week with Tina and Lisa up for elimination, which is karma since both opened their gullets to say they wanted to go home. Tina is eliminated and I guess she'll have to try to obtain a smokin' hot swimsuit bod at home.

Survivor: Nicaragua - Over at La Flor, Brenda is able to decipher the hidden immunity idol clue so she and NaOnka head over to Tree Mail to find it. NaOnka finds the idol, hides it in her shoe, and continues to be an a-hole. In the usual guide-your-blindfolded-tribe challenge, Brenda leads her tribe to immunity and reward (courtesy of Sears: fishing gear, cooking supplies, and a tarp). Chase finds the latest immunity idol clue and shares it with Brenda and as they search for the clue, she probes Chase on if he trusts NaOnka. He's so dense so Brenda spells it out: NaOnka possesses the idol and Brenda helped her obtain it, but she begs Chase not to tell anyone (especially Nay).

Jimmy T serenades Espada with the classic "American Girl" as they roll their eyes. He's becoming more and more annoying, demanding to get more action in challenges, refusing fishing assistance, and not wanting to be the leader (yet wanting to be the star and OK, maybe leading once). Heck, Espada even practiced the blindfold challenge with Tyrone being the new leader, but the challenge was an ultimate fail. Jimmy T continues being an annoying dick and once he calls out Marty in front of the tribe, he moves to the top of Marty's shitlist. While Danny seems like a logical choice to go home since he's weak, he's a swing vote for Marty and Jill; oh and Jimmy T is sooo annoying. At Tribal Council, Jeff seems almost appalled at Danny sitting out at challenges with his bum knee. Jimmy T gets emotional at Tribal Council upon learning that maybe he's annoying and trying to hard. In the first real close vote of the season, Jimmy T is voted out 5-3.

Top Chef: Just Desserts - Gail and guest judge Gale Gand (hereby known as Gale 2) announce the Quickfire challenge: use Breyer's ice cream to make the ultimate ice cream sundae. Seth is so psyched to make his ice cream because I guess the dozen cartons of Breyer's ice cream on a table didn't click with him; "weak sauce." He's nucking futs, starts shaking, spazzing out and then throws a hissy fit in the stew room while waiting for the Quickfire to start. I guess Seth had some paper cups and believes production took them and this will ruin him. Through Zac's 1-on-1 interview we learn that Seth continued to freak out, demanded his passport, plane ticket and left the show. While the house kinda rejoices that his baby antics will be gone, they hear ambulance sirens. Seth had an anxiety attack, fainted, and 911 came to scoop him out (unintentional ice cream pun). The producers decide he's not clear to compete any more and he's out. But who will cry for the red hots now??

Back to the Quickire: the chefs drawn ice cream scoops to select their flavor. They also learn the winner gets immunity. Worst are Eric, Erica and Danielle (who made a Neopolitan with Rocky Road- gross). The favorites: Zac deep fried his ice cream in panko crumbs and Morgan had "hot" cocoa with frozen ice cream. Morgan's mint Oreo treats win, giving him the vapors since he was inspired by his son for this challenge.

Elimination challenge: working in 3 teams of 3, they must create desserts inspired by the Lucent Dossier Experience (some performance art thing). The kicker is they must also create a "flaming" dessert and a showpiece for a total wow factor, and their individual desserts must go along with the theme of the showpiece. Since there was an uneven number the show brings back Heather C, the Debbie Downer who was eliminated last week. Right away she feels her team captain, Zac, isn't a fan of her. No honey, that's me. Her confidence is lacking so she's an annoyance in the kitchen (and in their loft). She also mopes the whole time. Go away.

The Lucent Dossier Experience performs for the dessert party and it's as if Dave Navarro ran Cirque du Soleil (that means I'll take a pass on it). The judges bring Morgan, Eric, and Heather H to the table first. Morgan had immunity, yet really made an effort with some tasty sorbet. Heather aced the showpiece and the chai taste and the textures really came out in her tart (or was it a cake?) Eric ups his game and turned his roulade on the side, showing he could have some plating skills. The winner is Morgan, which does not amuse Heather H who did 2 desserts while Morgan only focused on 1. Since there were hits and misses on both remaining teams, they are called back. Yigit is chastised for not presenting the "flaming" portion of the "flaming dessert" for the judges. Zac, Malika and Heather C are called back after the other team's short debriefing. Zac's banana curry cake was surprising and pushing the envelope, though a little unfinished in presentation. Malika put saffron into panna cotta and while she is receiving her praise from Gale 2, she pipes in that she wants to be eliminated. What is with the quitters this week?? Malika is sure about her choice, despite an exceptional dessert, and peaces out. Quitter quitter chicken dinner.

Project Runway - The designers are forced to switch models and then the challenge is announced: design a look for Heidi. Hello, narcissism! It's athletic wear for New Balance and I could tell you where to buy it, but I don't want to hock Heidi's self-promotion. She constantly mentions where the line is being sold like we might forget, but in the workroom she does a great job critiquing. She also puts a sassy Mondo in his place, so he cops a 'tude. Gretchen gets a little moody too when Heidi notes that it doesn't use any of the fabric in the line, which is needed. After Heidi's critique ends she drops the most predictable bomb on the contestants: create 2 more looks. Ok, I didn't see it being 2 more looks but you had to know they'd be making another garment. Again, 90 minutes to fill. Help arrives in the form of former contestants- another duh moment as soon as they mentioned getting help. Ahh reality TV predictability.

In the workroom, Ivy and Michael C battle it out about personal issues and she claims he cheated. A realization hits him: everyone hates him and thinks he's a cheater. He's pretty upset with that. He should be more upset at his Thanksgiving color palette. Others are like STFU, let's work. Tim Gunn enters the workroom to confront the cheating rumor: apparently in the Jackie O. challenge the models and designers saw Top Stick tape in the bathroom. They told the producers after the fact and they said "too late." Tim tells them to STFU, it's a non-issue, and no cheating happened.

Top group: Mondo, April and Andy. Mondo had to dump his signature bold prints for the muted colors, but plays off geometric shapes. He includes fun headbands, which is all me. His looks are very baggy and hangy; not my style, but judges like it. April goes "high fashion but still comfortable" and of course uses black. A lot of the looks are sheer, so to me I say nahhh. The judges think it's sophisticated and modern, but color is an issue. Andy's looks are sporty and comfortable- love it! The prints are fun, but would work with Heidi's existing line. Andy wins the challenge and his 3 looks will be available with Heidi's new line of clothing on a website that shall not be named.

Bottom group: Gretchen, Michael, Christopher. Michael uses a plethora of ugly colors (orange and brown). They're overworked, over-accessorized, and it doesn't work. Christopher has never designed active wear and it's apparent. It's not even Forever 21- it's like The Rave or Deb workout gear. "Sadness personified," declares Michael Kors. Gretchen gives a back-handed remark about Heidi's line, wanting to put in some transition pieces that are "more sophisticated than a hoodie." Heidi looks so insulted. These clothes look like someone trying to be hip and seriously, a Flashdance-esque cropped top?? Christopher is eliminated for designing a "sloppy pajama party" and honestly I forget this guy is on the show each week so it's for the best.

Photo Credits: BravoTV.com, CBS.com, MyLifetime.com, NBC.com, Survivor.com