February 8, 2011

Reality Rundown: Buggin' Out

2/08/2011 Posted by Mel Got Served , , No comments
Costa Rica is full of lush rainforests, active volcanoes, fantastic wildlife and helicopters!!!

Chantal is the recipient of the first date card: a 1-on-1 date teasing "close your eyes, hold on tight, love is in the air tonight." Indeed it's in the air because they fly in a helicopter (!!) to go ziplining on the longest zip line in the world in the rain. That's 2 for the season count right there! They even zipline together which reminds me of the scene where Cru Jones and Christian (aka Lori Loughlin aka Aunt Becky) go ass-sliding in Rad. Brad and Chantal have a romantic dinner by the river, but it begins to rain on their parade. Soaked to the bone, they run to, well some house I guess they had a room at, and dry off. Wisely, Brad lets a wet Chantal wear a white button-down shirt and no pants because it's sexy and he might get a nip shot. While making me extremely hungry as they eat dessert, Chantal lets Brad know her feelings for him, she's not crazy, and they make out. A lot. Get a room! Oh wait, they have one. Chantal receives a rose.

Date #2 is a group date with Emily, Jackie, Brit, Crazy Michelle, Ashley the dentist, and Shawntel. They go rappelling down a waterfall, which is awesome because Michelle made Brad promise to never rapell with anyone else besides her. Haha bitch. More exciting, yet another super extreme stunt date! Michelle decides to be a real c-word because she hates sharing Brad and can't get over that lameass rappelling pact, but when Brad lets her go last and rappels with her, she's all smiles.

After rappelling they find a hot springs to hang out in, because Costa Rica is short on rooftop hotel pools. In solo time, Jackie kind of whines that Brad chose to rappell with Michelle and not her. Waaah. Emily lets Brad know she is liking him more, but tends to sabotage relationships with guys she likes (foreshadowing, much?) While bathing with crazy Michelle, Brad hears some insane screaming which is Alli, all the way back at the villa, screaming about a giant beetle. Michelle grills Brad in the hot tub about his bond and date with Chantal, which really pisses him off. Michelle doesn't think Chantal is the right girl for him and basically he tells her to buzz off. Since all these bitches be crazy, Brad doesn't give the rose to anyone. Some Costa Rican cleaning lady scrubbing that hot tub is going to be so excited.

Alli, the girl who always gets interrupted, finally gets a 1-on-1 date. The date cards as her to "meet me at the alter" because yes, they are getting married. Seriously- you bitches read into these cards too much. Turns out alter means going horseback riding to a ravine to then take the girl afraid of bugs and bats into a cave. This some Golddiggers: Secret of Bear Mountain shit. Ok, not really, but there's a lot of bugs and Alli gets freaked out, which is good TV. As they climb through the cave, they find the "alter" which is rocks that formed into a staircase (very cool). There's a picnic at the alter and Brad seems to be digging Alli now that he can talk to her and not get interrupted by some random trick. Later they have dinner on a platform in the middle of some hot spring where conversation is kind of lacking and any conversation is sort of opposite plains. It's so obvious he's just not that into her; it's friend zone time. Brad lets Alli know he cannot give her the rose and the date ends.

Brad is pretty mentally exhausted from his date with Alli and wants time alone with his thoughts. It's, of course, the ideal time for the producers to send crazy Michelle up to his suite to bother him. What a shock, they hardly talk and just make out. Michelle gives the lonely rose the side-eye and lets Brad know that letting Alli go was smart and that Chantal is a bad choice. Michelle gets shady and starts listing out who should be eliminated next, and then after that, etc. Michelle leaves, confident she's made a great impression on Brad. Brad is tired of Michelle questioning his decisions, though, and feels like she is a root of this evil sometimes.

Pre-rose ceremony cocktail party: Brad's kind of a mess, which I'll pretend is because he didn't get to talk to his therapist on-camera for us, but it's really because "someone gave him grief" about not giving out a rose. The women quickly deduce Michelle is the culprit. In her solo time, Brad lets Michelle know that she's "scaring him badly" and not in a sexy turn-on way. Michelle puts the blame on him, saying he pushed for her to give him dirt, then insists she's meant to be here. Michelle won't admit she gave Brad grief until the women give her enough grief for her to admit she went to Brad's suite to complain about the rose. Oh and in positive news, Chantal drops the L-bomb and informs Brad she's in love with him. Yeah that was fast. Brad seems like "wow already" and asks why, and apparently empathy and sacrifice are her reasons.

Chris Harrison pops up out of nowhere. I'm assuming he's been circling around Costa Rica for days in a helicopter, waiting to clink that champagne glass. Only one woman gets cut this week and upon finding herself in the bottom 2, Michelle gives the crazy eyes to Jackie next to her. Ugh- crazy Michelle gets the rose. When will her reign of bitchy terror end? Hey at least Jackie got a private concert by Train? Oh wait, she got totally jipped.

Season Tracking
"Here/not here for the right reasons": 6
Helicopter date count: 3
Super Extreme Stunt date count: 4