July 31, 2011

Reality Rundown: The MelGotServed Pre-Show Winner Prediction Week 3 Curse Lives!!

7/31/2011 Posted by Mel Got Served , 1 comment
Big Brother 13 - Week 3

The house is being run by Rachel again- ugh. The house pretends to be happy but it's toast for another newbie pair. Dominic hopes his friendship with Dani pays off, but Brendon feels like the obvious choice for nomination is Adam and Dominic. Jeff feels like since Rachel/Brendon bossed around Jordan last week they should have a say in it. Later, when Rachel's HOH room is revealed she is pelted by pillows from all her HGs. I wish they were stones. Slightly later, Adam heads up to kiss Rachel's ass and try to save himself by suggesting Kalia and Lawon have done jack shit (true). Lawon, rocking orange Crocs and striped socks as every fashionista does, also kisses some ass and pretends he's actually done stuff and deserves to stay in the game.

Gone is Have/Have Nots this week and in is a Luxury Competition for everybody to play (including the Golden Key floaters). Some random dude comes out but won't reveal his name. You see this random dude has the same name as a celebrity, so there will be clues that will to identify this alleged celebrity. The first clue are bars of soap and some opera glasses or binoculars. Jordan puts it together and guesses David Hasselhoff. The other guesses include Michael C. Hall (Dexter), Michael Jackson (he's dead Porsche, you dumbfuck), John Stamos, etc. Basically everyone just names names as clues come in like a microphone, a knight with a lifesaving can, and eventually Kitt from Knightrider with David Hasselhoff exiting the vehicle. I hope they didn't let Hasselhoff drive that car- boozer. After giving David a tour of the house, he reveals Jordan is the winner of the luxury competition. She gets a private party to eat, drink and watch a preview of the new CBS show Same Name. Gag! Jordan gets to bring along 3 people so chooses Jeff, Shelly, and Kalia. Cue Rachel the HOH to be flabbergasted that Jordan had the gall to not choose her. I smell another tantrum!

Jordan and her crew head up to HOH to dine on sushi with the Hoff and then pretend to enjoy Same Name. Hoff pretends he gives a shit because that's what he does since he's a sellout. Jordan knows that Rachel is probably pitching a fit downstairs. Meanwhile, Rachel throws on some crocodile tears and a tantrum about helping Porsche, wanting to get sushi, fighting a lot with Brendon. Brendon's even like "I'll quit this game right now!" which is the equivalent of "I'll turn this car around right now!" Brendon wants to win and says he only came into this house cause Rachel wanted the money. They are terrible. Goddamn, I can't take these 2 for the rest of the summer. I'd rather watch Same Name than this bullsheeeit.

Once the sobfest stops, Dominic joins Brenchel in the lounge to propose aligning with them because they'd always be bigger targets than him. Brendon explains this target business as well and points out Jeff isn't a huge target since he doesn't win anything. Rachel whines more about Jeff and Jordan and Dominic gives his word on a deal. Dominic relays this immediately to Dani, who really wants Dominic to eventually nominate Jeff and Jordan. Dani heads up to HOH and works a little couple vs. couple dissension, wondering which couple would flip first. Dani thinks it would be smart to get Jeff out of the game this week, but Brendon worries about ruining their game too early. Jeff joins the HOH crew to do damage control for the luxury comp, where Brendon and Rachel pretend they didn't spend the afternoon crying about their loss.

When it comes to nominations, Rachel doesn't seem to grasp the way to get one player in her alliance another partner. Rachel nominates Dominic and Adam for eviction. Wait, this is week 3? Does the curse remain? I thought I dodged it by 3rd eliminee but it looks like it is the actual week that may be truly cursed.

Dom hopes he's a pawn in all of this but Daniele hopes that not only can Dom be saved, but maybe she can convince Rachel to make a huge power move. Adam and Dom wonder if the plan is to backdoor someone else like Lawon and Kalia. Rachel offers to make a deal and Dom is like "Yo bitch, remember the deal to keep me safe?"

Dom hopes Dani can protect him, as they flirt all the time. Jeff and Jordan don't like the bond they're forming and wonder if getting rid of Dominic is the better move. Dani tells Rachel (with creeper Brendon watching) that the house would love if she made the ballsy move to nominate Jeff and Jordan. Rachel and Brendon ponder what moves to take in a repulsive bubble bath together. If they were to backdoor Jeff and Jordan, it's Jeff they'd have to worry about but is it wrong to turn on an alliance so early? Playing his cards hopefully right, Dom tells Rachel he trusts Brendon and Rachel 100% and is down for a deal to team with Dani and them. Brenchel of course want Dom to throw the veto, so he says he will. This is a brilliant edit to make it seem like Brenchel wanted to backdoor Jeff/Jordan as opposed the shitshow that really went on. The other vets are totally onto Daniele and she's in big trouble.

No one dares check the ping pong balls in the veto bag, so it's obvious that along with Rachel/Brendon and Dominic/Adam, Jeff and Jordan get drawn to play the veto. Of fucking course. The backyard has a giant paper mache lady in a bathtub with big ol' leg hair stubbe, which freaks out "keep it smooth" Jeff. Anyways, each hair contains a letter and they have 10 minutes to gather letters and spell the longest word. TECHNOTRONICS FTW!! Everyone is working hard except Dominic who I guess really is throwing the veto by plucking letters and just tossing wherever, but decides he kinda has to attempt to spell to make it look like he didn't completely throw it. Dominic's word is "STANDINGS" and they're like, that's a long fucking word for someone throwing a comp. Rachel attempts to spell "MOISTURIZING" but spells it wrong, which is no surprise. Adam takes the leads with "FRACTIONS" by buzzing in before Dom, then Jeff gets the lead with "EXPRESSES" and the early buzz. However, Brendon the dickhead-being-edited-as-a-good guy wins the Power of Veto with the word "UNDERSTANDING."

Now that Brenchel have all the power in the game, they can re-evaluate the nominations. Rachel asks Dani her thoughts on nominating Lawon and Kalia, but Dani thinks the powerplay for Jeff is a better and bigger move. Dani is just sooooo frustrated that Rachel still won't trust Dominic. Dom watches out for himself and tries to campaign for votes early. He tells Shelly that some day it would be good to get rid of Jeff, and since Shelly trusts Jeff and Jordan she's ready to tattle immediately. Shelly tells Jordan, who runs up to the HOH room with Shelly in toe to confront Brenchel about what Dominic told Shelly (partner up, take out the vets). Brendon tells Jeff what's crappening and how insistent Dani has been to nominate Jeff. The vets are pissed that Dani is forming another alliance to take them out so the plan is formed: take out her ally Dominic to punish her.

With the veto in hand, and anger in that shaved head of his, Brendon chooses to not use the veto and leave nominations the same. SHIT. I thought I escaped the curse because I was like "Oh, third eliminee" but it is week 3 people and I think the Mel Got Served pre-show winner prediction for Big Brother shall come true again.

On the Thursday results show, Julie rocks a gray suit with a sleeveless blazer because hey, it's summer? Or she has no style. You decide. Julie announces "double trouble is done and no one is safe." Thank god these stupid pairs are ending. Once either Adam or Dominic are eliminated from the game, there's 10 players and individual gameplay begins (and the Golden Key holders can play again) though does it really matter when there are 4 vets tightly aligned?

Dani is pissed that Brenchel didn't save Dominic and if he goes home, she's alone and they wanted her to be a pair with him. Dani and Brendon get into it and she's tired of him treating people like shit. Meanwhile, Kalia lies to Jordan about knowing about the plan to backdoor Jeff, mainly because Jeff and Jordan decided to not talk to her for days. Jeff wants Dominic to admit he was wrong and point the finger at who wanted him out. Dominic tries to do some damage control since Dani totally fucked his game. Jeff compares Dominic's siding with Dani and keeping quiet to being an accomplice to murder- a logical comparison, of course. The winner of the "trying to hard to be funny and clever but not at all" award of the night goes to Brendon who refers to Daniele as "The Venus Fly Donato." You suck, Brendon. King Jeff thinks there should be a house meeting to call people out.

More drama: Brendon, who is sooo much smarter than everyone, gets pissed at Kalia and calls her an "all-time floater." She won't take his smarmy shit, so yells back. This leads into the house meeting/fight club. The vets cut their ties with Kalia after she was down with the backdoor Jeff plan and relayed information to the other side. Rachel, Jordan, etc. imply that Dani is a shitty friend, so then Dani finally speaks up. She calls Rachel an idiot, which Brendon gets all pissy about. Daniele confesses for coming up with the plan and explains it wasn't personal, he was just her biggest threat. Dani doesn't like those vets acting like they own the house and Jeff doesn't want to watch these idiots on TV all summer. Neither do we!

In the goodbye speech, Dominic says some people are spineless jellyfish and need to start playing or they are just handing the game to other people. Dominic said if someone had a spine to actually play the game he would've had a better summer. SERVED! The live votes are cast 7-1 to evict Dominic. The Mel Got Served winner prediction curse lives on!! It's week 3 and my pick to win is eliminated again. 3 years in a row- fucking trifecta!!! Dominic's post-eviction interview is about his throwing POV (stupid move, dipshit), his speech (light a fire under the losers doing nothing), and his friendship with Daniele.

As the houseguests get ready for the HOH competition, Julie calls them back into the living room for an announcement. Golden key holders are back in the game, duos are over, and everyone is playing as individuals. Julie warns the twists are far from over, so get ready for Dominic or Cassi to re-enter the game (no1curr about Keith). By the way, this wasn't an announcement. They all knew 10 players meant individuals and you told us 11 seconds into the episode. FAIL.

The HOH competition is an endurance competition to balance on a pair of skis angled downward (there are poles to hold onto). The last HG hanging on wins but of course it's not easy, as the skis swing side to side and the wall moves and shakes them. Damn, your hips will be lookin' fly after this. The first 5 eliminated HG have to grab a giant snowball with either something good or bad in it, but one has $10 grand. Julie gives one last twist before heading out: snow blow! Turning on my live feeds now for a long night hopefully ends with someone not shitty winning HOH.


Anonymous said...

Great job Mel. I can't stand smarmy Brendon either. --Gary