September 18, 2011

Reality Rundown: Rachel's Enchanting Laugh Wins Big Brother 13

9/18/2011 Posted by Mel Got Served , No comments
Big Brother 13 - Finale

This horrible summer of Big Brother is finally ending!!

After an extremely long season recap, we just back into the first part of the final HOH competition. The HGs spin around in the butter pool and get splattered with paint or something. Adam falls first, of course, but lasts almost 29 minutes which is about 27 longer than I predicted. Porsche is nauseous and sadly she doesn't projectile vomit into the butter pool. At 46 minutes, Porsche leaps off in sickness meaning Rachel wins first part of the HOH.

Adam and Porsche face off in part two oh the HOH competition; the winner of this competition battles Rachel in the final HOH com. Adam and Porsche each participate separately and it's an underwater maze to slide HGs heads across paths to get to their correct HOH order. Adam, who has floated through the game, is not so buoyant in this competition. But this is definitely a hard challenge, diving up and down and gasping for air. It took Adam 6:03, but Porsche wins with a time of 3:50.

To fill more time, the jury members sit to talk about the final three, which includes Kalia and Jordan joining the gang. Jordan says Rachel is the best player and should win. Dani argues Rachel is the ultimate floater, going back and forth to the power. Kalia respects Rachel's game now and Shelly doesn't know why they'd reward some a malicious person (to which Jordan points out Shelly is a shit-talker too). Kalia redirects the conversation to discuss the other two. Kalia thinks Porsche has competed and stayed out of the drama, but Jordan starts screaming about Porsche doing nothing the whole game. Et tu, Jordan? Shelly points out Adam made no moves when offered, but JeJo don't care because he was loyal. Everyone argues and bickers.

Porsche and Rachel, hidden from each other by a divider, compete in the final HOH competition. The competition is the same as every season: guess the possible ending to a jury member's statement. The questions are a total crapshoot which explains why neither can seem to get any right. Rachel wins with 2 questions correct, a landslide victory. So based on the jury, just hand her the $500,000 now cause I'm tired of her fake tears. Rachel has to make an immediate choice of who to bring with her to the final two. Rachel keeps her final two deal with Porsche and votes to evict Adam.

The jury are brought out to the studio audience area to question the final two before they are released from the house. The jury wants to know why Rachel should be rewarded for her bratty, mean behavior but she justifies it based on gameplay. Jordan uses her sit around in a bikini hatred AGAIN. Shelly asks Porsche to explain her gameplay and big moves, which a kinda non-existent except she did well at the end of the game. In her final speech, Rachel repeats the same shit over and over and get it you: you always competed, you played hard, you deserve it. Porsche says she played social and physical and pointed out the jury are the same people who saved her week one.

The jury votes and Dani gets one last Rachel dig in "You're lucky this is not a personality contest." Adam still thinks he would've won the game and is confident he'll be on All Stars, which is the funniest thing said all season. But the votes aren't ready now as we have to sit first through the non-jury HGs recall what they've watched all summer. Dick points out that Daniele made the worst move splitting the veteran alliance so early. Cassi was surprised to see how hard Shelly played and that she fooled her. Shelly defends her game and Jeff says they have sort of made amends. Kalia defends her game again saying Daniele did not call all the shots.

Time for results- finally! Julie pulls the keys out one by one and in a 4-3 vote, Rachel wins Big Brother 13. Rachel might not be a houseguest I like, but she deserved the victory after some of the other awful gameplay her housemates had. In another unsurprising vote, Jeff wins America's Favorite.

Well another summer of Big Brother comes to an end. Thank god.

But most importantly, the week before Big Brother 13 began I made my pre-show winner prediction. While I lost, I did win in my predicting the person who would ultimately be eliminated week three. I had the biggest pre-show winner prediction turnout ever and many got close to the end. However, for the first time ever for any winner predictions we have a winner. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, zingbots and sweet-tooth sharks, our winner is.... @ChitownBB!