July 20, 2015

The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All to Kaitlyn But Are Still Super Boring

7/20/2015 Posted by Mel Got Served , No comments
Week 10 - The Men Tell All

It's time for the Men Tell All special but sadly this year I am seeing it all from home and not with the amazing opportunity to see it in person (shoutout to ProFlowers!). Within ten minutes of the episodes, I begin to hyperventilate over the news that Bachelor in Paradise will be on two nights a week (Sunday and Monday). Four hours AND an after show? PLEASE HELP. How will I recap it all?

After a video synopsis of the season, Tanner starts the conversation about Ian being disrespectful and they are more than just movie quotes and fart jokes. Only Corey takes a stab at Kaitlyn slamming her actions (btw, Corey never STFU for a guy who no one remembers), and heartthrob hero Ben H steps in to make sure the guys don't bash Kaitlyn. Ian takes off his jacket and gets down on his knees to apologize to Kaitlyn, her family, and the guys for being an a-hole. Clint talks about his totally not gay friendship with JJ and that he was into Kaitlyn. Basically, the guys are sad that the guys isolated themselves from a bigger circle of bros. Kupah stops all this JJ/Clint talk to bring up Nick "suckering" his way into the show. The guys are divided between being OK with Nick joining the cast and hating it. Kupah is a believer that if she had feelings for a guy pre-show then she shouldn't have accepted the role as Bachelorette. Josh still can't get over the "I see my husband in this room" comment. But it's Clint who is the wisest of them all, pointing out that the other guy's opinions don't matter and it was Kaitlyn's journey to decide. 

Hot Seat Happenings! JJ regrets being a crappy friend to Clint, and the term "JJ blew it" sends Joe into a teary laugh. JJ believes his sense of humor didn't mesh with the guys. Ben Z. relives his breakup with Kaitlyn and the fact that he still hasn't cried since the day his mom died. Apparently a funeral date is not a good way to get a guy to drop his protective walls. Thing is, it's hard to think Ben is still moping since we all know he's going to be on Bachelor in Paradise and probably hookup with many gorgeous women. Jared's facial hair has been tidied up and he pretends to be sad too eventhough at the beginning of the episode he was making out all over Paradise. Jared is moving on. Moving on to Paradise. Ben H gets the biggest catcalling cheers of them all, recalling how much he loved Kaitlyn but knew she was more connected to the other guys. The off-camera hotel hangout where Kaitlyn told Shawn he was the one definitely impacted Ben as well, eventhough he didn't hear it since he was showering. He just felt the vibes. Anyways, this is a grand act of perfection to have Ben H. as the next Bachelor.

Kaitlyn is brought out on stage in her shimmery dress to face her former boyfriends. Kaitlyn discusses the awful hatred coming her way this season, which hurts her family more than her. Chris Harrison reads aloud some of these tweets and they're horrendous. Appalling, though kind of rude of the show to give these pieces of garbage the time of day. To the losers who send Kaitlyn death threats: get a life. Then the guys get to talk to Kaitlyn, which goes better than the mean tweets for the most part. A cocktail party wouldn't have helped save Jared and since all her relationships were different, she felt that since Shawn was obsessed with trust she had to share the sex news. Kaitlyn explains how pre-show she connected a little with Nick, but didn't expect he'd come on the show mid-season. Best burn of the night: Johnathan talks about the "my husband is in the room" comment and she reminds him he chose Britt. Corey yaps about this again but no one cares because it's Corey. TL;DR, being the Bachelorette is hard. The guys are full of apologies to Kaitlyn including Ian and night one drunk Ryan. The show rolls the bloopers for everyone to lose their GD minds, Joe wears a pigeon mask to scare Kaitlyn, and with that, the Men Tell All is over.