Sound the conch shell, Survivor is back! With his bright orange baseball cap on, Jeff Probst begins to narrate among the pure chaos of a classic Survivor marooning. The three tribes (Brains, Brawn, and Beauty) have just a few minutes to gather their survival needs and GTFO the boat. Baskets are thrown everywhere, chickens flying away (rescued by beauty tribe Caleb from drowning), and it's general helter skelter. But that's the best part of a premiere! Everyone jumps ship, literally, and gets on their little rafts covered in supplies and makes their way to their new homes.
The Brawns AKA Totang get right to work building their shelter and making alliances. Former NBA player Scot gravitates towards bounty hunter Jason and Jennifer. Cydney and Darnell bond a bit (right before everyone catches him pooping in the ocean - #aquadump). Alecia is on the outside of the tribe since she's hardly brawn compared to the rest. However nothing on this episode compares to the bug crawling and living in Jen's ear, leaving her in excruciating, bleeding ear pain. Totang watches as the bug eventually crawls out of her head and all is well, but like maybe lend a helping hand next time?
Chanloh AKA the Brains has a noticeable age gap and potential alliance of four younger people vs. two older. One said older is Debbie, a true gem of casting, who has held a bazillion jobs, can allegedly make fire without flint, and is the kooky control freak of the tribe. Debbie balances out her nuttiness when she comforts a dehydrated and emotionally distraught Aubry. The Gondol tribe of beauties has a true star and ultimate fan favorite right off the bat: gardener Tai who is protecting trees from Caleb's "murderlizing" and putting the chickens on a leash for freedom. The girls think he'd make a strong addition to gain control of the tribe until Tai is caught literally ripping trees out of the ground to find an immunity idol. Umm, Tai.. the idols are IN the tree holes, you don't need to upend the entire forest. But he's a gardener so at least he can fix it after.
[All images credited to CBS]